october 24

so...

i went to trinity church again this morning.

and i brought craig. (applause here)

I have officially decided i love going to church.

we walked in, and sat down.

laura (whispering): craig, black pants don't match navy blue vests... are you wearing under armor?

craig: yes they do. they match fine.

laura: your embarrassing me.

*craig takes off the vest*

There was an asian girl who sat in front of us the entire service, taking notes in a book and snapping pictures on her digital camera every five minutes. This may not have been so bad, except there were probably only about 25 people in the entire church. so it was pretty blatant. As we were sitting directly behind her, i was able to watch her zoom in and out and stand up at random points to shoot some pictures of the preacher. This is when i started laughing.

craig: laura....

laura: nhanammhm... *points to girl taking pictures*

craig (loud whisper): achemhahama. stop laughing, or their not going to let us in next week.

laura:mmaahahahammm.. you should ...hahahahave seen me a few weeks ago.

craig: i'm surprised we weren't stopped at the door on the way in.

some random lady gets up to say a prayer:

Lady: And we pray for the Diesis and we pray for the president Barack and we pray for the united nations... and united nations day is October 24 by the way... and we pray for the governor...

*Laura (who hasn't stopped laughing about the asian girl yet* looks at craig who is purposefully biting his lip and staring intently at the floor to keep himself from bursting out laughing) laura starts visibly quaking back and forth and biting the back of her hand to keep from laughing any louder than she already is.

asian girl: point..chik chik...CLICK.

lady: and also we pray for Rob dean who passed this week in the hospital in Lexington

asian girl: chik chick...CLICK

Laura in the meanwhile still can not stop laughing

Craig starts slowly scooting away from laura

BUT WAIT. that is not all!!

THEN... when the collection basket came around. the asian girl put it on her lap and started taking up close pictures.. proceeded to not put any money in it, and pass it the wrong way. Then when she went up for communion, and gave the camera to someone else to take pictures of her receiving communion. CLICK. CLICK. EXCELLENT.

The back of my hand literally starts turning purple and white with bite marks and broken skin.

i point this out to craig. who sighs, rubs his forehead, and tries to remember why he's dating me.

O measureless might! Ineffable love!
While angels delight to worship Thee above,
The humbler creation, though feeble their lays,

With true adoration shall all sing Thy praise.

...and God be with you, this week and always...

CLICK

laura: *takes her hand out of her mouth and turns to craig*: don't you dare say a word to me before we get through the procession line or i'll start cracking up again.

craig (to the asian girl): hey get a picture of us! we're REAL CHRISTIANS!! Photo opp.!!

laura: oh my god.

I kid you not...